Seeing the Possibility in Every Moment: Marina & Kevin Krim
“The 25th of October will always be a difficult day for us, prompting unanswerable questions like “why?” But Lulu and Leo, without physically being here, still have a way of comforting us during these emotional days. This time, they sent us a hug through a timeless song performed by musicians we truly admire.”
I want to share a special story from this past summer. I’ll start with some background. We’ve been fans of the band Pink Martini since they first performed back in 1994 at the Hollywood Bowl. Since then we have seen them perform over a dozen times. Founded by Portland-based pianist Thomas Lauderdale, Pink Martini is an international, multilingual 10+ member band, reminiscent of a 1930s big band. Their shows are fantastic — they are clever story tellers, they invite people to dance on stage and everybody leaves the show inspired with a happy heart.
We’ve always immersed our kids in their beautiful music. When Lulu was born, I would sing her their song “Hang on Little Tomato” at bedtime. And for her first Halloween, we dressed her up as a tomato inspired by that song. When Lulu was just two years old, we brought her to one of Pink Martini’s rehearsals at the Hollywood Bowl.
We also played several of their songs at the memorial of Lulu and Leo. At that time, I wondered if their music would ever bring me joy again. I wasn’t sure it would.
This past summer, we spent a week in Pink Martini’s hometown of Portland, Oregon, visiting dear old friends. On the last day, Kevin and I were able to sneak away from our friends and kids — mainly, we wanted to check out the neighborhood in Portland where we had read that Thomas Lauderdale lived. We figured the band was in the midst of a tour, so it would be safe to go and snap some photos of each other posing in front of his place. With a little internet sleuthing, we found it.
While taking photos on Thomas’ doorstep, suddenly one of the blinds at the front door popped up and standing directly in front of us was the Thomas Lauderdale. He opened the door and, with a puzzled smile, said, “Hello, do I know you?” We introduced ourselves as big fans and he kindly invited us in for a tour. Thomas was friendly, authentic, kind — we were shocked to be standing with him touring the band’s rehearsal space and his eclectic flat, happily amazed and amused at the situation.
After touring and talking for awhile, Thomas invited us, our friends and the kids to go with him and some friends that afternoon to a beautiful, remote beach on the Colombia River where they had built a fort out of driftwood. On an incredibly warm, clear evening, the kids played in the water and we admired the gorgeous scenery. With toy-like freight trains chugging along the far side of the Columbia, we watched a huge cloud of smoke from a wildfire blossoming in the distance, catching the pink light of the sunset. It was one of our most favorite, spontaneous days ever. We were happy to show our kids how to “See the Possibility in Every Moment” with an experience like this.
A month later, we bought tickets to the Pink Martini show in Staten Island. The day of the show, October 20, we sent Thomas a quick message to request a favorite song “Clementine.” This song has always been special to us — I used to sing it to the kids at night, changing the lyrics from “I’ll always have my Clementine” to “I’ll always have my Lulu (or Nessie/Leo) time.” Whenever I hear it, I’m transported to a heartbreakingly happy time with Lulu and Leo.
That night during the show, Thomas started in on a story. It was the story of when he found us on his doorstep. Then Pink Martini played “Clementine.”
This beautiful song was played for us just five days before the 5th anniversary of Lulu and Leo’s deaths. It’s hard to put into words how meaningful that was to us. The 25th of October will always be a difficult day for us, prompting unanswerable questions like “why?” But Lulu and Leo, without physically being here, still have a way of comforting us during these emotional days. This time, they sent us a hug through a timeless song performed by musicians we truly admire. We will forever be open to discovering the creative possibilities in this big, beautiful, complicated, often terrible, sometimes lonely world.
During his story (before the above video of “Clementine” starts), Thomas described to the crowd how our day at the fort on the Columbia was the last before the wildfire that we had seen in the distance swept through that whole stunning Oregon side of the Colombia River Gorge, along what’s called Waterfall Alley, devastating one of the most beautiful places we’ve ever seen. The unspoken reminder: appreciate the moment…it’s fleeting.
